I am full of energy and purpose

I am so tired but I can not turn my mind off.  Thoughts are racing and scurrying through my brain like hamsters spinning in a wheel.  Thankfully the thoughts are good ones.  A lot of energy and purpose.
These days of being true to myself are good.   These days of learning how to ‘be’ and setting appropriate boundries are good.
The years of solitude and angst …the years of suffering quietly…the years of feeling unworthy…feeling small…inadequate….full of shame.  Those years are gone.  I can let them go now.
There will be no more self abuse.  There will be no more selling myself short.  I have worked so hard and journeyed to places so horrible and vile within myself.   I have hated and angered and lashed out and mutilated every part of me….no more.   I have discovered the woman that I really am at my core.

Who I am is strong, brave, confident, loving and generous.  I am real and honest and open.  I am full of life and adventure and curiosity.
So screw all the bastards that have selfishly manipulated and  taken for themselves.  All the pricks that said I was not good enough. I know better.   I no longer have to stand before you and scream.  I no longer have to defend myself.  I no longer have to hide the goodness of me.

My abuse does NOT define me.  It is a part of me but it is not who I am.


2 thoughts on “I am full of energy and purpose

  1. stephanie gillard says:

    Very powerful! Being true to yourself is the most powerful gift!

  2. Alex Vorobej says:

    What an amazing testament to self understanding and growth. This is why moving forward is so important!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: