allowing sadness

While sadness is not an emotion most would choose,  I am allowing myself to feel it today.   For too long I have forced myself to feel, act, respond or behave in ways that others have deemed appropriate.  I did not ‘own’ the feelings or actions….they were someone else’s script.   I find I can not longer live with that  incongruency.  Authenticity is really important to me and to my healing.

Today I am sad.  I am allowing myself to grieve loss.  I am acknowledging the years I ‘lost’.  I am honouring my inner child.  I am feeling her sadness and confusion.  I am not going to make light of her pain.  I will cry and do so with no apology.  Doing this will allow me to move through without getting stuck.

If you are feeling cut off from yourself I encourage you to find a quiet place and simply ‘be’.  Allow whatever you feel to come up.  Don’t force it any which way.  Express it, feel it, move through it.  If you need someone with you because you are afraid of what might come up – then call a friend to be with you.  Help them to understand how to help you.   My friends know that if they get this call it means I need physical presence only.  No questions, no platitudes, no answers….simply come and sit with me.  Hold me if I ask you to.  Just ‘be’ with me.

My personal sad journey today will be short-lived as I have professional obligations to tend to.  But for now I am allowing sadness.  It will allow me to emerge stronger and happier.  Give yourself the gift of allowing emotions and thoughts and behaviours that are authentically yours.

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2 thoughts on “allowing sadness

  1. Wow! Those are powerful statements. I am glad that you could write about owning your sadness, even if it is for a short time. So many abuse survivors, including myself, in order to survive our childhoods, had to shut down emotions. I have had to relearn how to feel anger, hurt, sadness, loss—all of those which should come naturally to us. Thanks for sharing this article.

    • cyncee says:

      Learning so many things along the way. Learning and re learning. Mostly learning to be true to myself and ignore the noise and expectations of others. Sadness is okay. I will no longer accept anyone telling me to smile when I really don’t feel like it. Just as I will no longer stop smiling when I feel like it. Fortunately smiles are frequent in my life. I hope the same for you.

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