Survivors ~ Core Issues

I have been doing some research today and came across a book that is referenced below.  I have not downloaded the book but did download the .pdf that has some good information in it.  I thought I’d share the following as it really does highlight the core issues that survivors face:  self-worth, autonomy, emotional expressiveness, gender identity, and sexuality.

More specifically, these issues include:

• developing a steady sense of self-worth and letting go of their sense of themselves as worthless and shamed,

• setting boundaries on the behaviors of others such as learning to say no when they do not want to do something or asking     sometime to stop a particular behavior and do something else instead,

• standing up to others who want to bully them or boss them around,

developing capacities to identify, regulate, and express emotion in ways that are appropriate to the situation,

• having a strong sense of self and not be talked into doing things they regret later, while still being open to what others want,

• establishing intimacy which often involves learning to manage slights and not being swallowed up by hurt and shame when slighted or hurt,

• as parents, being authoritative and not authoritarian or permissive with children,

• negotiating cooperative relationships with others in the workplace,

• accepting themselves as females and males and no longer feeling as if they do not measure up to what they think are ideal standards for their genders,

• coming to terms with and working through any affects that the sexual abuse may have had on their sexual identities and sexual expression, and

• learning to understand sex as an expression of love and intimacy.

* taken from ‘Child Sexual Abuse:  Child Survivors, Mothers, and Perpetrators Tell Their Stories.  By Jane Gilgun PhD and Alankaar Sharma, MSW

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